“Let it go”
Scramble the name,
or block them
It’s up to you
how long you wish
to keep seeing them
moving on & happy.
You won’t always feel
happy for them,
Sometimes you will
your loneliness may
come in the way
steal all your vigour
to live on your own terms
& make you pity yourself
for no reason.
All the reason
you gave yourself
when you promised yourself
to never let anyone belittle you
shall be sadly forgotten
submerged in false guilt
of letting go
of thinking it could’ve been you.
That happy couple could’ve been you both.
But really really really
retrospect to all the times
when you had to choose yourself
& kindly remind yourself the why.
Because no one else can.
Maybe your closest friends will
but it would only matter when it comes from you.
Make the slate clean,
Sometimes weeding out toxicity
can seem like taking away medicines
but it’s not, it actually was toxic.
You’re happy for them. Good.
But when they moved on,
they made a decision.
So don’t feel obliged to wait
or hope that they may come around
Because they may as well
marry that new person
while you’re here sobbing
on the memories long past,
Angry on no one but a ghost,
Upset with a wall
that doesn’t want to hear you.
they may have asked you once
but if the next day
they found someone else
they were already replacing you
you were sadly still just an option
And you don’t need
that sort of commitment
you make them your only one.
it may seem so,
but know this inside out,
It’s never selfish
to let go
for the sake of your sanity.
It’s ok to stop waiting & move on.
It’s ok to stop looking at their happy
And make your own happy.
I want to take a moment to express something personal. This page is a reflection of me. And while a lot of my work pertains to the fun parts of life--like love, happiness, and prosperity--there are the rougher aspects. The misery. The heartache. The sorrow. The depression. I don't always post exactly what I'm feeling--but I'm going to start to. Because people need to embrace their emotions. All of them. Not just the good, but also the bad. Yesterday, I was reminded by someone dear to me that this page reflects honesty. So, I'm going to be honest: .
Lately, I've been down. I've hit a low I haven't hit in a while. I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety, sadness, and depression. I've been lost in my head. My mind is a tumultuous sea; I'm its timid ship, trying to reach the shores. Trying to see the island of happiness. I've been stressing over work, this page, and the course of my future. About past pains and issues I haven't fully rectified. Being human is messy and chaotic. We never have things figured out. .
But maybe we're not supposed to. Maybe this is the only way we can constantly strive for the best version of ourselves. I'm unsure. But I know that I've been dejected lately. And I'm not going to hide it. I need to face these emotions. That's why I'm vocalizing it here, to all of you. I know I'll get through it, but I need some time. I need to figure out many things.
To all of you: thank you for being here. I'm grateful. .
If you read this, please share your thoughts below. Thank you all so much. .
-Some Narcissist Are Just Never Full-
Opening up a door with this piece. I lived through a horrid childhood. A mother that was locked in her own world; locking my siblings and I in a world of abuses. When we are older we think we can breathe cause we have escaped. And We Can ....But, Oh how there are days when our abusers find their way back to us. Needing to make themselves known! Needing to know they can still hurt us so they feel they still own our lives. —They don’t own anything but the past they still they are now locked in! The scars they left on our bodies and sewed into our souls are the same scars that haunt them endlessly. That is their purgatory! They take their day but we have our bodies and our mending souls; the two parts of us they can never scar again. —
——POEM—— There are dark clouds today,
roaring and rolling with triggered
A storms eye set on maiming
what’s left of a soul it still craves.
Thunder explodes throughout the grisly clay of the grey drenching charcoal that
claims this day.
Streams of the most luminous lightning scatters, stretches and cracks like an endless echoing whip further than even dry eyes could see.
It’s as if Zeus himself unleashed his furry with a single vibrating mumble.
Releasing an unceasing symphony of cascading torrents to drown any clinging vigor.
No shelter except this pale shivering skin.
It’s only my bones
left holding on.
Holding on to this swirling debris,
that feeds the purgatory she sleeps, eats, and breathes. ~Lisa Marie~