#guruaverse#fitover50#socialnotsales#assumecompetencealways#goodenough#offtheselfhelptreadmill#lovewhatyouhave#mypractice is my own 😊
My belief is that there are spiritual teachers everywhere, every day.
However, I also believe that aspect of my life is not something I want to make a economic transaction.
I respect that some people do. But find it oddly invasive when people send private sales pitches about my need to lose weight (Seriously? That's not what my doctor suggests. ) or become more enlightened.
I know I can learn something from everyone - regardless their age or life experience. But something in me bristles when people who don't know me assume they know to what it is I need to learn from them.
For the record, it is daily that teens & twenty-somethings DO teach me patience and other valuable skills. But that happens without me signing up to pay for it. 😜 #Illcometoyou#grownunupstillgrowing
This is what happens when people put sugar in my yogurt! 😵
2 hours ago
I've been thinking a lot about these 3 photos lately. I wish I've kept some photos from before the 3rd one was taken. I used to be an over weight kid that never quite fitted in until I got fed up of being bullied and went from 80kg to 55kg in less than 6 months. On the 3rd photo I'm about 55kg and while some of you might think I look good, let me tell you something: I did not feel good. I felt rotten. After the grueling diet I did to lose all that weight I was not only brainwashed but ended up developing an ED. I stopped eating out of fear I'll gain my weight back. My sick brain convinced me that if I woke up full of energy that meant I had to starve myself until exhaustion. In my country girls are praised for being skinny, so all the compliments I would get would only fuel my obsession.
At some point I got tired of being tired all the time and feel weak. And I started eating again. Then my fear of gaining the weight kicked in and this is how I developed Bulimia.You feel like you're drowning in the middle of the street and no one can see you. Because you're so good at hiding it.
Fast forward to almost 4 years ago when the second photo was taken (82kg), when I found Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. At that time I have given up on how I look. I felt heavy and slow. I would just refuse to look at myself in the mirror. I wouldn't weight myself. I refused to be in photos. I isulated myself in the new country.
The 1st photo is from last weekend, where I weighted in at 71kg for a Brazilian Jiu Jitsu tournament. If someone had told me 5 years ago I'll be comfortable in my own skin - I would never have believed it.
Just wanted to tell anyone who is going through this alone - it gets better! You're not alone in this! Food is not your enemy and neither is your body. Start working on healing your mind first. You're stronger than the voice in your head that tells you you're not good enough. That you're not slim enough or pretty enough. Because you are enough. Just the way you are.
4 hours ago
Surprising results or not? Let me know what you think below.